[ well it's after execution. taair is now dressed down in comfier clothes, sitting up on one of the clinic beds, with a bag of ice held to his head. ow. he looks okay, just dusty and. miserable. but at least okay.
mizu pauses by the door, standing just in the threshold of the room. gives him a once over to make sure he's in one piece, despite having watched the whole execution. hello.]
[ he laughs at it anyway because you like. just kind of have to. but beyond that, he shakes his head - reaching out to nudge out a chair near the bed. come, sit. ]
... That's the first time I've ever done anything like that. [ taair says, after a moment, looking down at his hand. even after last week in the military camp. ] ... Taken someone's life, that is.
... I'm not surprised. [even putting today's display aside.] You're soft. Kind. Those are qualities that rarely survive when you truly commit to taking somebody's life.
I don't want to lose them. [ he admits, after a moment - a vulnerability to his voice, even here. ] If I'd had my choice... we both would've walked away from it, with her healed of her infection.
I know that's not how the world really works. [ taair adds, and shakes his head, hand curling. ] But I wish that it was. Perhaps she was right - that I am a coward.
he nudged the chair forward earlier, and it was ignored in true asshole fashion. but now mizu will walk over and take a seat. try to hold his gaze, if taair doesn't look away.]
You're not a coward for wanting her to live.
[firmly. quietly.]
I have killed many men. And I will kill many, many more if I'm allowed to return to my life. [very matter-of-factly. detached from the gravity of it.] ... But even I wish there had been another option. Knowing what we do now about the infection. The interloper. These deaths should not have happened.
[ weh - mizu's so intense that it's hard not to, so as soon as he feels his gaze, taair does look up and meets his, finding a moment of anchorage in that steadiness.
and it's - it's really comforting. part of it is because he knows that mizu would not bullshit him, and it makes the truths that he delivers feel just as heavy, just as real. after a life full of pretty lies, this kind of company is beyond welcome, and he searches mizu's face for a moment, and then eventually, nods. ]
No... they shouldn't have. And whether they're merely "lost" or not, they're... still gone from us, until proven otherwise. [ a beat, and then, softly: ] Thank you.
[ he needed to hear it. ]
I wish there was more we could do beyond just... wait. I know Miss Neverah felt the same.
[the wait is the worst part of any situation, really. mizu studies his face for a moment longer, before pulling back. seemingly satisfied.]
They were already dead to begin with. Do not forget this. Now, their souls are beyond our reach. I believe what's lost can still be found... But in the meantime, we must endure.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
w2 sunday
and his door's open! what a sunday... ]
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mizu pauses by the door, standing just in the threshold of the room. gives him a once over to make sure he's in one piece, despite having watched the whole execution. hello.]
I assume they've already fussed over you enough.
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Haha... if you started to fuss over me, I'd be worried you were infected, next...
[ please do not joke about this. but he smiles, gently, gesturing. ] But I'd be happy for your company, my friend.
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[completely deadpan. please do not joke about this right after watching him shank your infected, murderous roommate.
... a sigh.]
You may have my company. After that ordeal, what's on your mind?
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[ he laughs at it anyway because you like. just kind of have to. but beyond that, he shakes his head - reaching out to nudge out a chair near the bed. come, sit. ]
... That's the first time I've ever done anything like that. [ taair says, after a moment, looking down at his hand. even after last week in the military camp. ] ... Taken someone's life, that is.
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I don't want to lose them. [ he admits, after a moment - a vulnerability to his voice, even here. ] If I'd had my choice... we both would've walked away from it, with her healed of her infection.
I know that's not how the world really works. [ taair adds, and shakes his head, hand curling. ] But I wish that it was. Perhaps she was right - that I am a coward.
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he nudged the chair forward earlier, and it was ignored in true asshole fashion. but now mizu will walk over and take a seat. try to hold his gaze, if taair doesn't look away.]
You're not a coward for wanting her to live.
[firmly. quietly.]
I have killed many men. And I will kill many, many more if I'm allowed to return to my life. [very matter-of-factly. detached from the gravity of it.] ... But even I wish there had been another option. Knowing what we do now about the infection. The interloper. These deaths should not have happened.
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and it's - it's really comforting. part of it is because he knows that mizu would not bullshit him, and it makes the truths that he delivers feel just as heavy, just as real. after a life full of pretty lies, this kind of company is beyond welcome, and he searches mizu's face for a moment, and then eventually, nods. ]
No... they shouldn't have. And whether they're merely "lost" or not, they're... still gone from us, until proven otherwise. [ a beat, and then, softly: ] Thank you.
[ he needed to hear it. ]
I wish there was more we could do beyond just... wait. I know Miss Neverah felt the same.
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[the wait is the worst part of any situation, really. mizu studies his face for a moment longer, before pulling back. seemingly satisfied.]
They were already dead to begin with. Do not forget this. Now, their souls are beyond our reach. I believe what's lost can still be found... But in the meantime, we must endure.
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[ there's a small smile, and he exhales out, too. ]
...I like that. [ to endure, and to keep moving forward. ] Miss Neverah would be proud - to be hopeful, but to be pragmatic about it, too.
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... She was a very practical person, wasn't she? Her company will be missed.
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I think that we balanced each other - it was part of why we got along so well.
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[these were some very different personalities.]
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We have a lot in common. Maybe moreso than anyone might think.
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[says mizu, who famously never bothers to ask shit about anybody's lives.]